Are You Really Giving Yourself Unconditional Permission to Eat?

You’re eating the pizza, but your inner voice whispers, "You need to get back on track tomorrow." Many people believe they’ve given themselves unconditional permission to eat—a key part of Principle 3 in the Intuitive Eating framework: Make Peace with Food. But often, lingering diet thoughts still influence our choices. Even when we're not actively dieting, we may be holding on to sneaky forms of restriction, scarcity, and guilt.

In this post, we'll explore what true unconditional permission really looks like, why it matters for your healing, and how to notice subtle signs of mental restriction that can limit your progress.

Jump to:

• What Does Unconditional Permission to Eat Really Mean?
• Why Full Permission Feels So Hard
• Why it Matters
• What is Mental Restriction?
• Journaling Prompts

What Does Unconditional Permission to Eat Really Mean?

Principle #3 of Intuitive Eating, developed by dietitians Evelyn Tribole and Elyse Resch, encourages us to Make Peace with Food. That peace begins by giving ourselves full, unconditional permission to eat.

But this isn’t just about eating "whatever you want." Unconditional permission means letting go of guilt, shame, and internalized rules. It means removing the moral value from food. It means no justifying, no earning, and no compensating.

It's the practice of eating from a place of complete self-trust.

This can be one of the hardest shifts for new intuitive eaters. Sometimes the mental deprivation is so sneaky that we don't even realize it's happening. I struggled with this myself for years. It's so easy—automatic for many of us—to place a condition on what we eat. (Think,"I can have this, but I need to be good tomorrow.")

Many of my clients are in this exact phase, working to unlearn years or decades of diet conditioning. It takes time and self-compassion to build a new foundation of trust with food and your body.

Why Full Permission Feels So Hard

Giving yourself true permission to eat is a powerful act of self-trust and autonomy. But that doesn’t mean it’s easy. Some of the most common barriers I see include:

• Fear of weight gain
• Fear of "losing control" around food
• Diet culture messaging
• Childhood food dynamics like scarcity, shame, or rigid food rules
• Systemic influences like fatphobia, misogyny, white supremacy, economic inequality, and other social determinants of health

We live in a culture that glorifies control and punishment. Giving yourself freedom can feel unsafe, at least at first.

Why it Matters

When you grant yourself truly unconditional permission to eat, something shifts.

Through a process called habituation, food loses its power. When your brain can fully trust that nothing is off-limits, the urgency to eat it all at once starts to fade. Cravings become less overwhelming. You begin to feel grounded and present with your meals.

You're no longer fighting your body. Instead, you're listening to it. And that opens up space for deeper healing and self-connection.

What is Mental Restriction?

Mental restriction is when you're physically eating the food, but emotionally holding back. Maybe you're allowing the pizza, but thinking, "This is my cheat day," or "I'll skip breakfast tomorrow to make up for it."

This kind of thinking still creates scarcity, which fuels obsession, guilt, and distrust.

Here are some common phrases that reveal mental restriction:

• "I’ll eat this now but skip dinner to make up for it."
• "I’m only allowing this because it’s a special occasion."
• "I’m trying not to restrict, but I still avoid carbs at night."

Try gently noticing your internal food rules. Write them down. When you catch yourself mentally restricting, ask:

• What belief am I holding about this food?
• What part of me feels afraid to give full permission?

And remember, this is a practice. You don’t have to "make peace" with every food all at once.

Journaling Prompts

It can take some time to figure out where you might be holding yourself from truly unconditional autonomy to eat. If you feel up to it, journaling on the topic can help with building awareness.

Here are some questions that can highlight where permission around food might still be conditional in your life:

• Do I feel guilty after eating certain foods?
• Do I still label some foods as good or bad?
• Do I try to eat “intuitively,” but secretly hope I’ll eat less or lose weight?
• Do I avoid certain foods unless I’m “in the mood to indulge”?
• If I eat something I used to restrict, do I spiral or try to make up for it later?

If you’re in this stage of intuitive eating, you're doing the deep, meaningful work of unlearning. And you don’t have to do it alone. Unconditional permission is a practice that gets easier with time, compassion, and support. I'm here to guide you every step of the way. Join my free 5-day Food Peace email series for reflections, tools, and encouragement, or book a free discovery call to explore 1:1 nutrition counseling and support.